Communicating with our children can be a hard thing to do now and then. We feel like they're not listening to us; they feel like we're not listening to them. Good listening and communications skills are crucial to successful parenting. Your child's feelings, views and opinions have worth, and you should make sure you take the time to sit down and listen openly and discuss them honestly.
It seems to be a natural tendency to react rather than to respond. We give judgment based on our own feelings and experiences. However, if we want our child to express themselves openly and honestly without fear of repercussion from us, we must be receptive to our child's feelings and emotions - thus being responding. By reacting, we send our child the message that their feelings and opinions are wrong. To opens a dialog that allows them to discuss their feelings further, and provides you a better understanding of where they're coming from, we must be responding and don’t hesitate to ask questions about why the child feels that way. Responding also provides you an opportunity to figure out a solution or a plan of action with your child that perhaps they would not have come up with on their own. Your child will also value the fact that maybe you do indeed understand how they feel.
Giving your child full and undivided attention is very important in these situations. Stop any of your activity so you can hear the full situation and make eye contact with your child. It's impossible to offers any potential solution if you are just too busy to listen to them. Never try to talk to them while doing other things.
Never discourage your child from feeling upset, angry, or frustrated. Our initial instinct may be to say or do something to steer our child away from it, but this can be a detrimental tactic. Again, listen to your child, ask questions to find out why they are feeling that way, and then offer potential solutions to relieve the bad feeling.
Just because they are children doesn't mean that they don't have any feelings and don't experience difficult times. We must show them that we care, and we want to help. We can show them that we have similar experiences of our own that they can draw from. Therefore, we must actively listen and participate with our child as they talk about their opinions and problems.
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ETIKA AKADEMIS
1 year ago
